ES SEN. SCHMITT
“What would you say if I told you we had reports of you suckin' on chili dogs behind the tastee freeze?”
JS JACK SMITH Read his response +
“Um, that's Jack & Diane.”
THE COLLECTION
37 EXHIBITS FILED
All exchanges.
ES SEN. SCHMITT
“Did you or did you not get into one little fight and your mother got scared, so she sent you to live with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air?”
JS JACK SMITH Read his response +
“That was Will Smith.”
ES SEN. SCHMITT
“Do you believe that a 7 nation army couldn’t hold you back?”
JS JACK SMITH Read his response +
“That is Jack White”
ES SEN. SCHMITT
“Sir, did you or did you not perform with your four brothers on The Ed Sullivan Show?”
JS JACK SMITH Read his response +
“Respectfully Senator, that was the Jackson 5.”
ES SEN. SCHMITT
“Isn't it true you also worked at Ray's Music Exchange in Calumet City, Illinois, telling people not to come back anymore?”
JS JACK SMITH Read his response +
“Sir, I believe you've confused me with "Hit the Road, Jack."”
✳
Real people. Made-up testimony.
Every exchange links back to its source. Some are excerpted for brevity.